Adventures into the wilderness and a sex shop

Today was an adventurous day for the Hubby and I. We decided to take a motorcycle ride to Pennsylvania with a friend. We reached speeds of 170 M.P.H. and saw many dead animals on the side of the road like deer, animals that were of the gray and furry variety and a turtle. I don’t know if the turtle was dead though. His shell was intact.

On the way back, we entered the town of Stroudsburg to get something to munch on. While looking for a place, I spotted a store called Condoms Galore. You can visit their website here: http://www.condomsgalore.com/. They had all sorts of stuff. I was looking to buy some lube, but due to their wide selection, I was unable to make a choice. Sometimes, less is better. They had: water based, silicone based, cooling, warming, vaginal, anal, universal, and the list goes on. I purchased a few goodies like a whip, a choker with chains and cuffs attached and the Jumping Pecker.

It is the cutest little dick in the world. What other little wiener can be this cute. You can wind this little guy up and it jumps around. After purchasing my little bag of goodies, we hopped on our “scooters” and left.

There were dead deer all over the side of the highway. It was horrible. One was smack in the middle of two lanes. I also saw a turtle. Did you know that there is a town called Buttzville. What a horrible name for a town. Imagine, “Where are you from?” “I hail from Buttzville!”

As we neared the Holland Tunnel, the adventure really kicked in. We were in the EZ Pass lane about to go through the toll booth when an officer, badge number 2986, from the Port Authority Police Department approached us.

This pathetic, degenerate excuse of man came at us screaming to cite the Hubby with $500 worth of tickets. Now here is how it happened. We were next to go through the toll booth and the screen said Go EZ Pass in green when the cuntrag tells us to pull over. Ok, fine. We pull over and he starts yelling to walk the bike over. This scumbag of a fake cop that failed the New Jersey Troopers test did not even want to give the Hubby a chance to take out his identification.

This prick was accusing the Hubby of purposely hiding his license plate and avoiding paying the toll. If the incompetent fool actually looked, he would have seen that there was an EZ Pass attached to the windscreen. Also, when we were approached, it would have been impossible for the irreversible moron to see if the plate was hidden. After the Hubby showed his identification and took the EZ Pass off the windscreen, the duchebag let us go, but made us go through the cash part of the toll booth to pay again. In a few days, when EZ Pass registers the payment, I am going to file a complaint against this loser and prove that he is incompetent at doing a simple job.

All in all, the trip was fun. It was nice to go riding without any traffic. The roads were smooth and open. It was a sad to see the dead animals though.